Self Identity,Individuality and opinion are major sensitive issues that most individuals struggle with. To be honest, these are the foundations in which the originality and perception of an individual stems from. A lot of people still struggle with their individuality because they are not sure of who they are due to people’s perception.
Now, it is a different issue if the next individual has a perception about you, but what is worse is if you take their perception as a fact and you dwell on it. People might have an opinion about you but it necessarily does not make it a fact so why let their opinion change or affect you negatively. I get infuriated when people get defensive just to prove a point that the next person’s opinion about them is not true. The truth is, you do not need to be apologetic about who you are. They are just opinions of you and not facts so let it go.
In Contrast, people would always try to walk you over and treat you like you are inferior to them if you are not very assertive of you who are. I have had personal experiences where I needed to stand up for myself and be firm. I figured out that if you don’t stand up for your right, people would continually step on you and make you feel inferior.
THEY TALK ABOUT US WITHOUT GETTING TO KNOW US
I was guilty of this when I was younger but now, I know better. A particular person I judged without getting to know her first is now one of my favourites in my life. That experience taught me a lesson. I know for a fact that most people exhibit a different personality just to mask their real self just because they have been through a lot and they would rather be firm than be vulnerable. So if you choose to judge this fake personality of theirs, then it’s your loss. Why not get to know them first, see their real personality then you can conclude.
Similarly, being assertive means you also need to understand your role in the world and how you influence it. It is okay for people to form an opinion about you but how you address or handle it is very pertinent. You can prove people wrong that their opinion is not your reality by not defending yourself. Sometimes silence is key.
However, no one should part with their individuality and become another person just because you want to prove a point. If you do this, it means you have not completely embraced your individuality and self identity. In a society where one is expected to conform to societal standards, then it is easy to be lost. However, when you know that you are unique and different from others then you will be able to live in a society where everyone has an opinion to say.
On the other hand, to those “who talk about us without getting to know us”, I think it is unfair to draw conclusions on opinions about others if you don’t know them. Some people have been through so much and judging them is the last thing you should ever do to them. Low self esteem and depression are products of societal judgements and conformity. Therefore, this needs to stop. I talked about this here
YOU SHOULD BE AWARE OF THIS
Judgements are made based on the outward appearance and this is a fact not a myth. However, before you make a conclusion of a particular person, why not get closer to them, relate with them and if your judgement of them is not wrong, then this makes your conclusion about them right.
Above all, to those “talked about without being known”, you should know that not everyone deserves to know the real you. Let them criticize who they think you are. Do not try to prove a point or defend yourself.
Most importantly, be sure that there are people who follow the crowd and there are people who struggle to be a better person and be unique. Which do you prefer to be?
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